Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Legal issues, schools and cars...oh my!

It's weeks like these that I am amazed that I am able to stay sane. I don't get too personal on this blog very often, but this time the news is important enough to my family and close friends who read the blog that it's worth it.

I haven't posted much at all about The Incident, other than vague references. Long story short, D was the victim of a crime and for the last almost 10 months, we've been dealing with the repercussions emotionally (with Alex), financially (lost wages) and stress of how long things were being drawn out. The accused was supposed to have a plea date while we were on our vacation and we never heard what happened. No one would return our calls. Nothing. Then a few weeks ago, D got a letter from the DA stating there was a hearing! Needless to say, D was there! As it turned out, the person had gone on the run and was finally caught. He entered a plea of no contest. That means he couldn't refute the video taped evidence but didn't feel he did anything wrong. In the end, he was given probation despite objections and ordered to pay restitution. Supposedly we'll start receiving that next month. I'll believe it when I see it!

Our lives have also been caught in the whirlwind with Alex. We finally received testing through the school for his Asperger's Syndrome. It's hard to get special education testing when your child is doing well academically. But when that same child is so far behind his peers socially, in a junior high setting, things change. Even though we had a diagnosis from a real doctor, it wasn't enough for the schools. This is when it's a good thing you homeschool and put your child back in to school. We had testing started immediately and wouldn't you know it, Alex is definitely no question about it, on the autism spectrum and qualifies for services. A score of 10 or better is needed on the testing and Alex came in at a 16. We've been attending meetings about services for him, too!

We've also requested testing be started for Ben. We don't suspect autism issues at all, but there's something going on that we can't identify. Ben took quite the fall when he was about 15 months old and we were told there could be some issues that crop up as he gets older. We were hoping the issues were related to his speech, but he's really struggling in school and we want to make sure there's not something else we're missing. He's a really good kid and it's hard to see him struggle. I know D really identifies with how Ben feels. D's older brother was an excellent student and D claims that his parents prefer D3. Of course, everyone else says S was the favorite (*hi!!! I know you're reading this*) But D was so incredibly traumatized by following after D3 that he was never given a fair shot at doing well in school. He could never be as smart as D3, as big as D2, or as handsome as D1, and D5 was the youngest and a there was no competing with that, either, and S is favorite because she's the only one with a name that doesn't start with a D! (Ok, family you should all be in fits of giggles because you KNOW how he talks ha ha) Anyway, D thinks Ben may be having middle child/following the "special" kids issues and is choosing to get attention in a way that's completely different from the other two.

And in all of this, D's car broke down. We're down to one car. We have a great mechanic who said it should be done some time today. As icing on the cake, this morning MY car wouldn't start. There's a short and it causes the battery to drain. D found someone to give us a jump. So, D has to change the oil, fix the brake switch and pull apart the door and fix the short there, too.

All of this has allowed me so much extra time the last two weeks LOL


  1. Lots of hugs to you. Life gets pretty hairy at times, doesn't it. I do think that it is sad that in our public schools, teachers are not allowed to teach and build relationships with our kids. You need to be the parent and the teacher- sad, isn't it? Continue to be a strong advocate for your kids, as nobody else will! Hang in there, sounds like you have had one rough period of time. I've been down that road with testing,'s an eye opener, that's for sure.

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  3. Wow! You are coping with lots! A little advice for you...with the legal system, don't expect to see any money for a long time if at all. Getting money from probationers is very difficult. It's an overwhelming system I am glad to be out of! If there are issues requiring therapy, visit the victim's advocacy program.

    The school system's can be a huge pain, too. Sounds like you are on track with your boys! Keep up the good work!

    (cleaning out the basement is my alter-ego)


Thanks and have a great day!